Monday, July 18, 2011

Shock and awe!

As many of you will know, the staff at the William Shatner School of Toupological Studies devotes an extraordinary amount of time and energy to the important subject of William Shatner's toupees. And we suspect the same is true of our readers. Whether its hourly, daily or weekly, your professional and personal lives must also be balanced against the need to undertake your own toupological studies as well as assessing and critiquing ours. "Honey, dinner's ready!"

"Just a minute! I'm studying whether a 1958 photo of Bill Shatner is or is not toupless."

But just once, we wanted to provide readers with something that requires no academic or scholastic endeavor - only awe and wonder. It's entirely fake, of course (like Bill Shatner's hair). Yet one can't help but wonder if the words in the clips below really had been spoken, would the world's economies still be so sluggish? Would the Arab Springs still be taking so long? Would the Space Shuttle still have been retired? Listen and be inspired...

And one more...

Audio sourced here and here. Any other ideas for creative splicing, let us know!

UPDATE: A new two-part making of... video of Bill Shatner's upcoming album Seeking Major Tom has been uploaded by the album's producers featuring the first ever audio clips of some of the songs. Could be the event of the decade!

From "Bohemian Rhapsody":

...easy come, easy go,
A little high, little low,
Anyway the wind blows, doesn't really matter to me, to me.

Is this a song about Bill Shatner coming to terms with the potential pitfalls of toupee-wearing?

UPDATE II: From a new The Atlantic interview on Bill Shatner being voted the undisputed King of Canada:

[Q:] If you were to become King of Canada, what are the first five commands you would issue to your Canadian subjects and why?

SHATNER: Off with his head, and his, and his, and his, and his.

Might another monarch say off with his toupee?


  1. Shatner exploits every Major Tom song except for Bowie's 'Ashes to Ashes', which contains the following line:

    Ain't got no money and I ain't got no hair

    Doesn't he dare sing this?

    Find the full lyrics here:

    lalala... my mother said to get things done you better not mess with Major Tom... lalala

  2. Excellent, and quite revealing, observation by tintorera!

  3. BTW. I was in London last week and I think I found the gadget Shatner used back in the 70s. It's called "Grow Your Own Head of Hair" and it's £1.75 only!

  4. Thanks for your comments. We most definitely look forward to analyzing the lyrics in "Seeking Major Tom" - and Bill Shatner's performance of them!

    On Monday, we'll have a new audio recording (real, not doctored) of Bill Shatner saying the word "toupee". Stay tuned!


  5. I am laughing so hard at the two soundfiles in which Shat "admits" his hairpiece that I am actually in pain. I have not laughed so hard in about a year. Thanks ShatToup!