Poll result and variegated toupological miscellany.

Our most recent poll asked for your thoughts on the question of when - or if - Bill Shatner went fully Patrick Stewart-style bald.

Only one voter thought that this was only in recent times; 5% thought it was during the 1990s, while he was in his 60s; 10% thought it was during the 1980s, while he was in his 50s; 18% thought it was during the 1960s, while he was in his 30s; 28% said: "Never. There's probably still something on top, though not much." The most votes, 35%, went to the 1970s option, while Bill Shatner was in his 40s.

Bill Shatner circa 1972 - was he already fully bald underneath?

Thanks for voting! Now for the variegated toupological miscellany part...

Firstly, we have a truly incredible image - perhaps the defining image of our age - Bill Shatner looking knowingly at a bald eagle. Is he angry? After all, the bald eagle isn't actually bald. So why call yourself bald if you're not? Doesn't that do a disservice to people like Bill Shatner? Or is it only fair? Bill Shatner doesn't call himself bald and he is, so why not the other way round? Or was Bill Shatner angry because he moved to the US when he learned that its national symbol was the bald eagle - and then he discovered that it wasn't really bald.


The image was on sale at eBay (apparently it's from a 1971 documentary).

To make matters even more poignant, here's Bill Shatner in 2008 talking about the plight of this bird (using the word "bald" three times) and contrasting it to action on climate change. Perhaps he feels great affection and empathy with any creature who is labelled as "bald"!

Next, it seems that Bill Shatner is increasingly sneaking the word "hair" into almost every interview he undertakes these days. Is this part of a process to make the actor more comfortable with such matters? Or is he giving a nod - as politicians often do - to his base?

Firstly, we have a recent radio interview in which Bill Shatner talked to Howard Stern (with George Takei also present - the full interview can be heard in three parts here).

The debate shifts to that eternally fascinating question of why Bill Shatner, now both wealthy and well into his autumnal years, still works so hard. Stern then reveals that he only works three days a week. Bill Shatner asks what he does with the rest of his time before adding "Well, I mean, cut some hair...!" An interesting suggestion for one's free time. Does Bill Shatner use his free time to work on his hair?


And did Bill Shatner know that there are questions about Stern's own hair too?

Next, we have a recent interview between Bill Shatner and his daughter Lisabeth, in which Captain Kirk set the nerdosphere ablaze by claiming that Star Trek was better than Star Wars (full clip here). Once again, Bill Shatner manages to sneak the word "hair" into the mix:

In this case, the actor's statements are pretty ironic considering his own toupological history.

"God knows what those actors [in Star Wars] look like in reality with all those special effects. I mean, there's no telling what ILM did for those faces and those hairdos. They may have walked around with nothing on! ... We don't know! We don't know what they were like."

Image sourced here.

The above words really could not have more double-meaning. The same, of course, can be said for Captain Kirk in the original series. Can we ever truly appreciate what the Star Trek hair department did for Bill Shatner? When the cameras were off, he too could have been walking around without his toupee - and, well, we don't know!"


Some of you also noted some interesting idiosyncrasies of Bill Shatner's "Denny Katz" in the aforementioned clip.


Was the toup dyed or colored darker than Bill Shatner's real hair at the back of his head (we'd say the answer to that is probably yes)? And what's going on at the sides?


And, as some of you wondered, is Bill Shatner's hair undergoing another major shift - perhaps a return to a style more akin to the "Jim Kirk lace" (perhaps as part of lobbying efforts to be in the next Trek movie)? Or is he simply utilizing the "flexible booster pack" abilities of the "Denny Katz"?


According to our "Department of Toupological Alterations" which is responsible for maintaining its color-coded "Toupological Advisory System", the risk of a major hairstyle shift still remains low. Their advise, at present, is: "Remain calm but vigilant as there are some minimal signs that Bill Shatner would perhaps like to make his 'Denny' a little more 'Jim-like'".

"That guy next to me actually has hair but shaves it! What's the world coming to?"

Finally, as reader "Clayton Forrester" pointed out, talk-show host Craig Ferguson recently included a Bill Shatner toupee joke in his monologue.

Toupee joke around 2m 44s.

What makes this all the more significant is that this was just days after Bill Shatner appeared as a guest on his show. We doubt very much that there were any negative vibes during that appearance or malice intended during the latter. Rather, it appears that the opposite is true.


So does Bill Shatner welcome good toupological jokes, even in public, from his friends (so long as he isn't there directly)? Or has Ferguson committed a major faux pas?


Thanks, as always, to our readers for your endless tips!