Sunday, July 22, 2012

Double poll result and a double-sized toup-less video shocker.



Two poll results? Where the hell have we been? Summer slumbers - not quite. A few months ago, our team received a desperate and urgent call. The equipment used by the scientists at CERN looking for the Higgs boson was just not powerful enough - they were stumped:


Could our touposcopes help?


Yes, they did! It was an electrifying moment, all the more so as the boson so closely appeared to resemble strands of Bill Shatner's "TJ Curly" toupee. What are the cosmological implications?


In our second most recent poll, we asked readers whether Bill Shatner was actively trying to morph his "Denny Katz" into a retro "Jim Kirk lace". 43% said yes, he wants to go full circle; 56% said no, he's just having fin with the versatility of his current toup. The remaining 1% (also in the poll below) was, alas, lost in toupospace!


And in our most recent poll, we asked readers whether they thought Bill Shatner had ever turned down a role that required on-screen baldness. Another close one: 46% said no, but only because such roles had never been offered to him; 53% said yes, he simply was not prepared to appear on-screen without hair!

Thanks for voting! We couldn't help but bring you this random Blofeld-esque Touposhop that recently appeared on the Internet:


And speaking of Touposhop, reader Paul recently sent us some ongoing "Jimifications" of Bill Shatner. Here's a selection of what he kindly sent us:


Recently, a 1998 Biography Channel documentary about Bill Shatner appeared on YouTube (we think that brings the number of biographical docs on Bill Shatner to three). It featured numerous pictures of the actor, which are, of course, of interest to any toupologist...

Before the "TJ Curly - Phase One" and "Phase Two", there was the "Phase, this is real!"

Late-era toup-lessness in The World of Suzie Wong.

Bill Shatner and Christopher Plummer.

What exactly is going on here?

Little Richard? William Shatner in Barbary Coast.

But it also featured something else - something that we had never seen before. Detailed motion pictures of Bill Shatner's father Joseph. We've previously brought you some stills of Bill's bald dad. But here, for the first time, we are offered a tantalizing longer glimpse of the son through the father. If you squint a little, it is just possible to imagine...

video

27 comments:

  1. Great stuff. The extra-ordinary power of The Toup never ceases to amaze me. Who would have thought that it would be responsible for holding together the very fabric of the universe?
    That picture from Tamburlaine the Great is very peculiar. The photo from the same play shown in 'Up Til Now' lacks the hairband and instead depicts a contrastingly low hairline.

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  2. Holy toupe..the Jimified Kirk from what looks like star trek III looks awesome. Like an age appropriate Kirk. I'm quite convinced now that the JKL was the right toupee all along...

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  3. Shats own real syrupJuly 23, 2012 at 12:26 AM

    Fantastic new toupless photos: shattoup you are a star, wow I never thought, anything like this, did you manage, to see the photo, that I emailed you about. Mine you that nothing, to what you have done! You really have to give it to bill, he tried the cover up, for about as long as he could. You have really made my day.

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  4. I asked my wife for a non toupologist (and possibly one of the few women that have seen this blog but I digress) opinion on the JKL on the post TOS. After berating me for wasting her time with such nonsense, she opined that you simply can't put the JKL on the older Shat and expect it to look good. It's got potential but it needs to be greyed, thinned and fitted better to his face. What worked in 1966 doesn't work in 1988 without some more toupashop magic. We can't just drag and drop the hair. As for me, one could have only wondered if Shat had kept the JKL his whole career. Might his secret have been safe? Do we need a ShatToup reboot, an alternative universe in which Shatner had forsaken all other toups? A question worth all of us to consider and one for our wives and girlfriends to wonder why the hell we waste our time on such nonsense.

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  5. It is interesting Most Jerk that you assume that most people that visit this blog are male. I am female and made an assumption (perhaps incorrectly) that most others on here were female too. Perhaps we should have a pole to determine if there is a gender bias to the study of toupology.

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    1. Wow Liv Long! A girl interested in Shat Toup! Where were you when I was single? Oh what might have been! Romantic dinners over candlelight, discussing the TJ Curly. Long walks on the beach as you run your hands through my fine mesh lace. And the children, think of the children! Bedtime stories of toupees long gone, dolls with shaved heads to attach our own handmade synthetic weaves. Allas it was not to be in this lifetime dearest LivLong!

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    2. Hey look at the picture right here -->
      So smug swimming under water! He's not fooling us!

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    3. Hey I just love the underwater shots of the TJC: Mesmerising. The Voyage Home had me convinced for many years that Bill couldn't possibly be wearing a toup when I watched the way it so elegantly moved through the water. But what will your wife think of you engaging in such suggestive toup-talk? Behave yourself you naughty boy.

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    4. Actually over the years, my wife has admitted to being a little "toup curious" and has confessed to dalliances of her own. It started innocently enough with a light mesh then progressed over time to full toup, phase II, hidden hairline. In the words of Jerry Seinfeld, "She's into it"

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    5. I also think that this blog has A LOT female readers (and I'm one of them).
      Entertainment for both sexes, it seems.

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  6. When one looks at pictures of the older Shatner (the side-by-side picture above is from The Undiscovered Country) photoshopped with the JKL, it becomes apparent how little his appearance changed until the middle 1990s when he really started to put on weight. Now I wonder what the young Kirk would have looked like the a TJ Curly on his head.

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  7. I'd always heard that baldness skips a generation and comes from the mother's side. So if your maternal grandpa is bald, you'll be bald. My own father is as bald as a ping pong ball, but I'm a middle aged dude with a full head of hair. So it would be interesting to learn if Bill Shatner's mom had a bald dad, too.

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  8. Stallion, that was certainly the case with me. I am nearly as bald as Patrick Stewart, but with a little patch of hair at the front, as was my maternal grandfather. The only difference is that my grandfather tried to cover up his baldness, and I buzz my hair.

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  9. Shats own real syrupJuly 26, 2012 at 11:53 AM

    This is a really interesting post. These toupless photos, shows clearly, that time was fast running out for the cover-up, I dont think he could have gone on another 2 or 3 years without some kind of help, the frontal hair in the first shot is begining to wane! Another 2 or 3 years, it would be noticeablely thining. Having said that there must be a very late (1960) photo of a toupless shat somewhere. If you one much later then that, you have broken into his house.

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  10. joeyjojojrshabadoJuly 27, 2012 at 2:59 AM

    Man, I would have loved to see what shatner looked like without his toup from the beginning of his jk lace period to his phase one tj curly. Anything after that he was using a full cap toupee or wig, and that probably required him to shave any remaining natural hair. So seeing him toupless after the phase one would just show him with a shaved head :(

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  11. It's thought that he still has some real hair at the nape of the neck that he doesn't shave off.

    BTW, I don't believe Shat ever had a hair transplant, either. It's all toupee all the time in Shatnerland.

    In fact, does anyone still think he has hair plugs? Maybe a new poll question.

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    1. joeyjojojrshabadoAugust 7, 2012 at 8:01 AM

      I imagine shatner looks like elton john without his wig these days, minus the sideburns

      http://www.allvoices.com/contributed-news/4952886-image55

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  12. Have you seen Bill's recent documentary "The Captains"? Lots of old photos of him in that too.

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  13. Ratty Lost Years PieceAugust 2, 2012 at 5:03 PM

    The TJ - It's full of stars!

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  14. just imagine STB - having an ultra secret one on one interview with shatner about the toups. sans toup. freshly shaven head glistening with soothing witch hazel. a 7hr interview (with bathroom breaks) complete with lunch, snacks and coffee talking about each stage of toups - the beautiful JK lace, the uncooked black spaghetti ratty Lost Years piece, the iconic TJ curly, the mysterious Denny Katz, all the secrets, the raw emotion. Plus the actual hair loss - when it started, how it progressed…everything. no stone (or indeed toup) left unturned. And other things too like showing old private photos/videos, recounting stories on set…and for the finale - a special one off viewing of some of the actual toups, touching them etc. just imagine it....just imagine...and then a couple of days later a phone call from Shatners agent - Mr Shatner wants you to write the book with him.. The first definitive analysis of the shatners toups as to be told by shatner himself in collaboration with STB.

    My god. Just imagine it…..the stuff of which DREAMS are made...

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    1. joeyjojojrshabadoAugust 6, 2012 at 2:52 AM

      I would pay good money to read that book or see that interview!

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  15. I under the desire to have a series of interviews with Shat on par with that of Frost/Nixon. The dream of full toupological disclosure is one that we all share and I confess I have had fantasies of my own. Allow me to share.

    I'm at a Comiccon convention, the crowds are heavy for Shatners hour long talk. The only place I can secure a seat is directly behind our honored speaker. As he begins his address my mind is dulled by the pomposity of the Shatnerian diatribe. Intense boredom at first followed by lulling of consciousness by the familiar halting speech patterns. I drift to an outer worldly state.Then as if by magic I suddenly spot the toup seam! Like the mythical Atlantis it was rumored to exist but now PROOF! What do to next? Fortunately we are halfway through talk and most of the audience is asleep. Now to make the move. But what move? My window of opportunity fast is closing. Shat makes it easy, walking backwards towards the rear of the stage I am now inches away from the prize, Oh to poke to prod, to touch.... to rip. "Steady boy steady" I repeat to myself. I surrender to the moment, the right hand reaches out only to grab......nothing! As if some toupological force field alerted the host, Shatner deftly moves to his left, thus keeping the secret safe for another 50 years. While I'm dragged away by event security, Shat gives me a look of disdain then a smirk runs across his face. His eyes calls me "amateur" then turns his attention back to the slumbering audience.

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  16. Shats own real syrupAugust 9, 2012 at 4:07 AM

    @most jerk. That was fantastic! If only...now I think is the right time, for me to tell the truth...this is going to be hard for me, ok I'm the one who has bills jk lace...there i've said it! Heres the story...back in 1969, march to be exact, I was walking down west street in new york, about 15 yards from me, there was a youngish man with light brown hair, walking and talking to himself rather loudly saying " damn star trek has ruined my life, I will be remembered as damn captain kirk forever! All I have now is silly parts in silly shows and cheap movies...i'am 38 and my career is over“ at just that point, his hands went upwards towards the toupee, and after saying " I will not need this anymore“ he pulled off the jk lace and tossed it away from himself..i could'ot believe my eyes...oh no I thought to myself, captain kirk wears a toupee! Without it his hair was very badly receeded, it wad a good thing that I was only 7 at the time, and found it easy to hide...anyway when he had walked some 50 yards from the toup, I thought now was the time, so I quickly recovered the toupee, before anyone else could take it. I first thought about running up to him and kindly telling him "sir I think this is yours“ however in the end this was just too good to miss ( or is it toup good too miss) so it has been in my collection of famous toupees, that include: john wayne, burt lancaster, and frankie lane.

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  17. as documented on this site, shatners deft 'katz like reflexes' will prevent anyone from making a grab for any toup

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  18. Come back Shatners Toupee, we miss you.......

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  19. Hello, I am a rare female to the toup site. Now if the shat has a wig, why did it not float off in the underwater scene from star trek 4? Is it hair plugs?

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