Monday, September 27, 2010

Poles and polls: we're back!

The "TSS Shatner One" sails away from Antarctica back to the WSSTS.

We're finally back from our groundbreaking return trip to Antarctica! Although, as expected, we didn't find any direct information about Bill Shatner's toupee, we did manage to conduct several interesting experiments, which examined the thermal and insular properties of replicas of Bill Shatner's key toupee stages. Perhaps unsurprisingly, the "TJ Curly" with its extremely thick and curly TFSISR (Toupular Follicle to Square Inch of Scalp Ratio) proved to be the hands-down winner.

Deforest Kelley needs a visor, but Bill Shatner only needs his toupee to stay warm. Image sourced here.

Now, turning to our most recent poll...

...40% of voters stated that the shockingly thick (and curly) look of Star Trek: The Motion Picture (1979) is what first aroused your toupee suspicions. Only 10% started to suspect while watching the original Trek series, while almost a quarter if voters say late-night TV jokes, press reports and other forms of satire is what made them suspect Bill Shatner's hair wasn't as real as they had once thought. Thanks for voting!


  1. Since I was a little boy I was dreaming of becoming a Toupologist.And what better place to study and learn from the best and the brightest than the William Shatner School of Toupological Studies.Knowing how hard it is to get admitted I guess my dream will remain just a dream.

  2. Welcome back!

    I recall one of two TV specials titled (?) TV Shows You Never Saw from years back. The first aired in the latter part of the '90s, and it featured scenes from a '70s pilot (maybe it aired as a TV movie after being rejected as a show) with Shatner as a lawyer. Most notably, they made fun of a scene where he overacted while he (apparently) sucked on a cough drop as he deliberated in court!

    Do you or anyone else recall what this unsold show/movie was?

  3. Fang Shih-yu, thanks for the welcome back! You may be referring to a little seen (we haven't been able to locate a copy) show called "Indict and Convict" (1974). More here: Indict and Convict -ST

  4. Yes! That's the title! If only I had my VHS copy of the TSYNS special (it aired on CBS) in hand, I'd send it to you straight away!

    Anyone who's seen these two specials (it was several years before the sequel [on ABC] came along) knows there were cool, ultra rare clips of pilots, which either were aired or not! Dumb shows out-numbered good ones, needless to say, in both.

    After the Shatner clips, my favorite clips (from the first special)) was for something called The Man with the Power! Trust me, the sample footage is worse than the show's title! Some crazy sci-fi/fantasy, that one!